Little Miss Can't Be Wrong

"For you formed my inward parts; 

you knitted me together in my mother's womb."

Psalm 139:13 ESV

According to legend, my mother got a call from my Kindergarten teacher indicating that there was a "situation."  Apparently, when I had finished all of my homework (first one of course), I proceeded to go around and correct everyone else because they were doing it WRONG!   To say that I became a perfectionist early in life is an understatement.

I was referred to as the:  overachieving, type-A, strong-willed, teacher's pet, know-it-all, kind of crazy girl.  I happened to have passed those traits on to my children. Well-meaning adults will often tell me that channeling and re-directing perfectionism will produce all kinds of miraculous results. Perfectionism can push individuals to excel, but usually only to a point...then it will drive them a little bat#@$% crazy!

While I have tempered some of my tendencies, I struggle daily as a micromanaging idealist.  I want everyone to be educated on the best way to do everything, but it is usually my way or the highway. Most of my behavior was modeled after the long line of narcissistic perfectionists that came before me.... on both sides of the family.

My comfort (and hope for reform) stems from the fact that the good Lord created me, and knows how best to "channel" my inner perfectionist for His greater good.  In the meantime, I will continue to fight the good fight to be little miss CAN be wrong....occasionally.

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, 

plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope."

Jeremiah 29:11

Calling All Perfectionists!

"The perfect is the enemy of the good."  ~Voltaire

• Do you have an opinion about everything and always need to have the last word?
• Are you hyper-sensitive to criticism?  
• Do you often feel like you are not good enough and should do more? 
• Have you ever re-done a chore or homework for your children, spouse or a co-worker because it was not to your standard? 
• Do you overcommit and then stress out trying to do it all?  
• Have you been labeled as an over-achiever, know-it all, teacher's pet, micro-manager, narcissist or control freak?  
• Do you seem confident, but suffer from low self-esteem?  
• Is it hard for you to admit failure or to ask for help?
• Do your compliments often end with a back-door jab?
• Are you content in your discontent and misery?
• Are you your own worst critic?
• Do you constantly judge others?
• Do you often feel anxious or exhibit ADD/ADHD or OCD behaviors?

If you answered yes to more than one of these, you may be a perfectionist. Perfectionism tends to infiltrate every aspect of life - from the workplace to child-rearing.  The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines a perfectionist as having a "disposition to regard anything short of perfection as unacceptable."  It is a double edged sword - the classic paradox.....you have to be perfect, but no one can be perfect.  It can drive you mad.

Being a perfectionist is often hard to admit because you have probably been one all your life.  Many of us come by it honestly, having been raised by one or two perfectionistic parents with high expectations.   I come from a long line of them on both sides.  It is a daily ongoing struggle, but there is hope.  

I am not a therapist or psychiatrist, but simply a self-proclaimed perfectionist on this wild and crazy ride we call life. If you struggle with perfectionism, or know someone who does, I invite you to join me on a journey of introspection and encouragement.

"This God - his way is perfect; the word of the Lord proves true; 

He is a shield for all those who take refuge in Him."  Psalm 18:30